Who is right?

A 6? A 9? Neither? Or both?

Two people stand on either side of a number. The number is written on the ground, between them.

One of them sees a six; the one facing them sees a nine.

Neither of them is blind. Neither of them is lying. Yet they argue, and as time goes by they insist on their own truth ever more loudly and more nervously.

Theory

This is what happens in the world day after day.

People are afraid of being left alone with their own opinion, so they want to force it on the other. That is where they hope to find peace, and if they don't get that peace, they get even more nervous.

But if we are so sure about something that we are right, why does it matter so much to us whether the other agrees?

If we are certainly right, shouldn't it be exactly our being right that reassures us: whatever happens, we are right, and that would give us happiness?

If the question comes up, the answer is clear…

It is time to step away from the arguing parties and look from the outside.

Examination

Let's put the question under a magnifying glass. Not whether it is a six or a nine. But why it is so important to them to be right.

As long as I am right, I am safe. What if I was wrong? Then it turns out I am not clever enough. Not good enough. They won't love me, they will cast me out, I will be left alone…

It is not about the number. It is never about the number. It is about being unsure of what matters in life and what doesn't. Unsure whether the thoughts raised into us are really our own.

And this uncertainty is what leads two people to quarrel, or even to let the argument turn violent.

So who is right?

Neither.

The one who is right is the one standing further away, watching them wisely. The one who doesn't join in, but asks the question: why are they doing this?

And whoever asks the question why has, in that very moment, stepped out of the argument. And whoever has stepped out suddenly sees the whole: the number, the two people, and the fear that nails each of them to their own side. Confrontation is opposition. And opposition is hostility, because it is built on fear.

This is the first step. Not being right. But noticing when you are fighting for something that never mattered to you, only to your parents.

But you are not your parents. Their fear, their weakness, is not worth carrying on. That is what keeps you from reaching what you have to reach. Perfection, happiness, freedom…

This is where knowing yourself begins. It is not who you are that you have to find. First you have to find who you are not. And once you have the answer to that question, you no longer focus on what is wrong, but on what is right…

The Spirit helps, and shows the truth…