Mind Reading 4 – The decision

A thought is a wave. Only the decision can stop it.

If our life consisted only of cyclically repeating the process with the decision switch always set to "YES, I DO IT", everyone would have to be happy, and then we couldn't even know that the switch exists; in that case free will would not exist.

However, the switch of Decision is there in the cycle. The decision exists. Most people have no idea what happens when that switch is set to NO, because they don't dare to flip it.

They are afraid to say no to conformity, to say no to unhappiness. They are afraid of loneliness, of a lonely old age.

Let's look at the following situation. A girl complains to her friend about her abusive boyfriend:

- Of course, I know I shouldn't let him, but he's my husband, isn't he?
- Hm - says the mind-reading friend.
- After all, he was such a "good" man, it's just that now he drinks a bit too much...
- Hm... - says the mind-reading friend.

Here it is clear that in the first sentence the friend asked herself, with the question "isn't he?", what on earth she is still doing next to a man who hurts her. Deep down she knows very well that this man was never good, he was always only pretending, so that he could have her, chain her to himself.

The mind-reading friend knew this in advance. That is why she didn't even want to go to their wedding. She already knew back then that there would be a divorce, or even worse...

But if she had told her friend earlier not to do it, she wouldn't have listened to her anyway. She still needed such an abusive "someone". Such a person is not a man. A real man does not hurt women; he has no need to gain self-justification that way, to prove he is good enough. Abuse is only done by weak, fear-filled guys, but those cannot be called men.

The mind-reading friend said nothing. She knew that her purity, her patience held up a mirror to her friend, because she herself is no longer in an abusive relationship. She knew about herself that she was lucky, because years earlier she had decided well: rather live alone in this world than as a loving couple in hell. She is waiting for the prince. And she will not settle for less.

Freedom has a great price, and it is a shame how vulnerable women are in today's age. It is extremely hard to find support.

And even if one manages to break free from the abusive relationship, there is no guarantee that her life will improve if she doesn't start practising mind reading. If someone doesn't learn from their mistakes, they fall downwards, and choose an even worse partner than the previous one was.

/Relationships article in preparation.../

From the previous example it is clear that if the decision switch is always set to YES, and she is with her boyfriend because of false excuses, because she is deceiving herself, then in reality that is what she wants, and she is living the result of that decision of hers. However, she could also decide to escape from the abuse. But that takes great courage, and she has to organise the escape.

This is the central element of mind reading. Saying NO. If we understand this, the problem of the decision will become so important that we will no longer use the word "thought" any more, but the word DECISION.

So the problem of humanity is the decision. Those people at the party could have decided to welcome with love the one who claimed to be a mind reader, and to talk with him.

That girl, before she married the abusive guy, could have been a mind reader, and if she had read the guy's thoughts, she would have fled from him as far as she possibly could. She had a decision.

We blink about 15,000 times a day. That is how many opportunities we have to decide correctly. Close your eyes, and when you open them again, resolve to say NO.

This link in the chain, the problem of Decision, is what we have to examine.
This is inner work, and we have a compass called conscience, which we have to dust off for it.

Conscience always shows you that you are worth much more. Never underestimate yourself. Deep down you know very well that this guy is not good enough for you. Say NO to him.

Because if everything were always good, and to our benefit, we could never end up in a situation where we feel unhappy.

So, let's look at a mind reading example. If a woman marries a guy, and they are supposedly happy, then how is it possible that they still divorce after a while? If they had made a good decision in the past, they couldn't divorce, because they would still have to be happy.

So the problem is that people didn't read the thoughts of their future selves. Because if they had read them, they would have recognised in advance, and avoided from afar, the "partner" they married.

Once more, let's look at the process in the life of a "slightly rougher guy":
The guy's girlfriend has dumped him, the guy can't stop thinking:
- Memory: what I do is constantly recall a pleasant feeling from the past. I can't accept that the girl broke up with me
- Desire: my mind gets the feedback that it would be a pleasant feeling again if I did again what I did in the past. I want to feel the girl's body, because I'm going mad that she isn't with me.
- Decision: I'll do it, because I can't control myself, I need to relive the feeling, I simply can't live without her.

You can feel that the desire to possess has fully awakened, and it is from this train of thought that scenes of jealousy, violence and murders arise.

The wave

That is why the word thought is like a wave. The wave arrives from somewhere, it has force, and only the decision is able to stop it. Should I do it, or should I not?

Catch-22

Let's notice that we started analysing a situation far removed from us, and in the end it is our own thoughts we have to analyse. So how is it, then? As long as we cannot control our own thoughts, how do we want to understand those of others?

And yes, this is the problem. Our own thoughts. Our own thoughts hold our mind captive, so that it cannot soar freely. This is the Catch-22. If I want to understand the other person, then I have to understand myself? But then which comes first?

They say: know thyself. So should I first get to know myself, and then get to know others? What is the truth here?

It is easy to see that the words we have known until now may not have an unambiguous meaning after all. But if their meaning is not unambiguous, then somehow it has to be made unambiguous, otherwise we cannot create order in the chaos.

So is there chaos in our consciousness?

If you feel the spirit, and would move ahead in this subject at the speed of light, I am here: book an online or in-person appointment with me from the menu…

Paco Que Ruach.